The divorce is over but the drama continues!
Might a parenting coordinator help?
Parenting coordinators are a relatively new way to help highly conflicted parents to co-parent.
WHAT IS A PARENTING COORDINATOR?
A parenting coordinator is a neutral third party who is trained to assist two divorced parents create, maintain, and monitor compliance with a parenting plan.
Parenting coordinators, including myself, are trained to manage chronic, recurring disputes between parents who reside separately, such as visitation conflicts, vacation conflicts, different viewpoints concerning school, sports, religion, consequences for misbehaving, concerns regarding the child’s relationship with other children and adults living in the other parent’s home; the issues are varied and change with each child’s developmental stages. Parenting coordinators also help parents adhere to court orders and protect their child. I and most of my colleagues are extremely knowledgeable concerning family law, conflict resolution and mediation, family therapy, and child development. To learn about the American Psychological Associations guidelines for parenting coordinators click here.
WHEN ARE PARENTING COORDINATORS ESPECIALLY USEFUL?
Parent coordinators may be particularly useful in the following situations:
(1)A parent has a severe personality disorder and is chronically thretening litigation or litigating;
(2) in families where parents have great difficulty coordinating childrearing decisions;
(3) in potentially abusive situations;
(4) when there is intermittent mental illness or substance abuse disorder in a parent; and
(5) where parents have difficulty moving from issues of the past that were a part of their marriage.
(6) Where children and/or the family are in therapy and their is a need to be protective of the neutrality of the children’s therapy, relieving the therapist of being forced to take sides in making decisions
The primary benefit of a parenting coordinator is to help families resolve disputes expeditiously. In high conflict families disputes can become more complicated and grow with time. For some parents an immediate decision may be better than waiting months to get a hearing date with the judge or spending the money and experiencing the aggravation of going to court for with an emergency request for an order. Closure to an issue may be the most important thing. With closure, the parties can return to implementing a shared parenting plan. To find out more about parenting coordination click here