Emily awoke on Sunday morning with one thought, “I am exhausted!”  She wanted to stay in bed but thoughts were running through her mind, the refrigerator was empty, the house was a mess, she had to review a presentation she was delivering on Monday, she needed to pick up her five year old daughter from a sleepover and take her to get fitted for her dance costume and on and on and on.

At 42, Emily had spent the last 25 years striving to be the very best and to do the very best. Her ambition was not the problem. The problem was that no matter what Emily did, no matter how she showed up, no matter the effort she made, she was not satisfied.

Emily is an accomplished professional who is the head of HR for a large non-profit. Despite her success and the appreciation her company has for her, Emily is still waiting to “make it.” Her work product is a constant worry.  Emily never feels satisfied with her quarterly reports or her workplace presentations. She...

Self Compassion

You had a hard day. You did not meet your productivity goals. You said something that hurt your friends feelings. In any of these situations, most of us would automatically be hard on ourselves. To be kind to ourselves might feel self-indulgent or guarantee we continuing making the same mistakes.

 Self Compassion isn't self-indulgent.

When we acknowledge our emotions in a non-judgemental way we process our experience in a way that allows us to learn from it.  You are not wrong for feeling pain, sadness, regret or any emotion.

Imperfection is the human condition.

When we accept that we are still growing and learning and subject to making mistakes, we acknowledge our humanness and can realize that we are not alone.

Self-compassion means treating yourself as kindly as you would treat a friend who needs that support.

Self compassion includes adopting healthier behaviors that support your physical and emotional strength.

Being hard on ourselves isn't...